plant your own garden instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers

March 9, 2008

i’m thinking that as i grow older, i tend to be more lonely. i sit in my room and bury myself in my medical textbooks (or at least pretend to) and think that maybe i am destined to be alone (hopefully not). i want to go out there and meet new people, see new things and embrace transition, but many things hold me back. i see myself struggling in a tight cocoon, half wondering if i’m ready to flutter my wings, half hungry for the excitement that the world brings.

i don’t really want to stay in the confines of my little room. it is a place where i find comfort in, but also one where excuses and escapism exist. i sometimes dream of having a garden tea party with my friends- think scones and jam and clotted cream, sitting in the sun and looking at the clouds through oversized sunnies. or maybe cafe au lait at one of those little cafes, we can share a nice slice of hazelnut torte while we laugh over life and watch the world go by.

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